Emily Post and I Disagree#
by Melody Brooke, MA, Conflict Coach, Motivational Speaker
Its a standing joke among couples, men being chastised about their rudeness for leaving it up. Understand, I am female and have experienced the trauma of sitting down in the dark on a toilet seat that has been left up. In Emily Post's "Essential Manners for Couples" she insists that "good manners" means for men to always leave the toilet seat down.  But I don't agree.

Why is it less rude for a woman to leave the seat down? Why is it assumed that men always have to be the ones to dirty their hands and lift the seat up?

In our society, men may have privilege in some areas, but as a rule, they are thought of as brutes, inconsiderate, and angry non-emotional loafs.  Just watch the commercials on TV! Women are characterized as being sweet, innocent, kind and emotional. Not so with men.

It seems to me that the "battle of the sexes" will never be resolved if we continue to consider a woman's needs and practices as superior to a mans.

What do you think?


Wednesday, December 02, 2009 1:05:24 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00) #    Comments [2]  | 
Friday, December 11, 2009 10:09:02 AM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00)
I disagree. It is a simple respect and courtesy to think about how the things you do in your home affect your partner who has to live there too. The consequences for him leaving the toilet seat up are very dire for me indeed and it is a minor inconvenience for him to consider that when he uses the toilet. Not to mention that the toilet just looks nicer when it is down. I give him the same consideration the same for him in other areas. For example, he likes certain pots to be hung in the kitchen in just the right place. I could care less where the pots hang but if he prefers it that way I take the time to put them where he wants. He like the toilet paper to be hung a certain way. Again, I could care less but I take the time to do it the way he wants because that is his preference. Its all about compromising and having and consideration for your partner's preferences. If you just do everything your way you will not be a very happy couple.
athena
Friday, December 11, 2009 5:17:53 PM (Central Standard Time, UTC-06:00)
Thank you for your comments! I certainly don't disagree that it's important to show respect and courtesy to your partner! It's just the idea, to me, that just <i>because</i> you are a woman it's automatic that something <i>should</i> be one way or another seems inherently wrong to me.
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